Here is Playbill On-Line's second annual survey of goofy titles of plays done on stage.
There were some truly bizarre titles in 1997. Special mention this year to the New York Fringe Festival, which proved to be a mother lode of odd monikers.
Here is a rundown of the oddest, as chosen by the staff of Playbill On-Line. As we did last year, we applied the following standard: Try to imagine yourself inviting a date to one of these, saying, "Honey, guess what? I've got tickets for us to see . . ."
The Travelling Cinderella's Dead Mother Show, at Mark Taper Forum in Los Angeles
O Little Town Of Bagels, Teacakes And Hamburger Buns, at AD Players, Houston, TX Demon Dominatrix of the Moon Meets the Amazon Queen of the Lost Lagoon, at True Brew Theatre, New Orleans
Praying for Sheetrock at Lifeline Theatre, Chicago
Butt Pirates of the Caribbean, at Luna Park, West Hollywood, CA
Dead Bolivians on a Raft, at Playwrights Theatre of NJ
A Clown, A Hammer, A Bomb, And God, at NY Fringe Festival
Dad Fought Hitler, the Bottle and Me, at Venue 9 in San Francisco
Bad Sex With Bud Kemp, at Second Stage in NY
Attack Of The Elvis Impersonators, at AMAS in NY
Blood Flood, at Chashama Experimental Theatre, NYC
Egg Yolk In A Pool Of Aqua Velva, at Ensemble Studio Theatre, NY
When Liberace Winks At Me!, at the Gardenia Restaurant in Hollywood, CA
What Remains of a Whore at Theatre Revelation, Hollywood, CA
Free Food & Frontal Nudity at Cable Car Theatre, San Francisco.
Kafka's Dick at Germinal Stage, Denver
Give the Man a Fish at Playwrights' Theatre of East Hampton, NY
Adult Child/Dead Child at The Why? Theatre, Chicago
Hymns for the Drowning at Playwrights Theatre, NJ
Cold, Frankin Sense And Brrr at AD Players, Houston
Six Women With Brain Death or Expiring Minds Want To Know at Forum Theatre, Thousand Oaks, CA
Bombs in the Ladies Room at 13th Tribe Theatre, Chicago
The Line That's Picked up 1000 Babes (And How It Can Work for You) Two Roads Theatre, L.A.
Vegetarian Carves the Bird at Tamarind Theatre in L.A.
Plastica Fantastica at Actors' Gang Theatre in Hollywood
Hell's Cuisinart at Scenic Wonders Productions, NY
The Bloody Melon Girl at Wooden-O in West L.A.
What Is Head Cheese? And Other Deli Stories at Nada in NY
A Long Swollen Journey Into Night" ( Episode Three of the Not-So-Marvelous Adventures of Swell Boy) at Theatre of Note, in Los Angeles
Still Life With Parrot and Monkey at Ask Theatre in L.A.
The Dismantling of Lemuel Pitkin at Actors' Gang Theatre L.A.
Bloody Orgy of the Bermuda Triangle Zombie Assassins at Seattle's Empty Space
Some Things You Need To Know Before the World Ends . . . A Final Evening With the Illuminati at Seattle's Empty Space
Wuthering! Heights! The! Musical! at Seattle's Empty Space
Crappie Talk at Group Repertory Theatre, L.A.
NWWYP (Never Whistle While You're Pissing) at The Group Theatre, Seattle
Blood Orgy on Hell Island. at Luna Park Theatre, L.A.
Alien Sex Cult Clones Madonna at Wings Theatre, NY
Fatty Arbuckle's Spook House Revue at Heliotrope Theatre, L.A.
Belgians In Heaven American Folklore Theatre, Fish Creek, WI
I Want To Be Pope! at Waterloo Bridge Theatre, NY
My Dick Done Broke at Ontological-Hysteric Theatre in New York
12 Steps To A More Dysfunctional Family NY Fringe Festival
The Hick, The Spic And The Chick at NY Fringe Festival
How To Get The Most Out Of Your Jet Lag (from The Netherlands) at NY Fringe Festival
Dog Spelled Backwards Is Krishna at NY Fringe Festival
La Vie Braindead at NY Fringe Festival
Mistress Elsa's Bondage Burlesque Emporium, NY Fringe Festival
Sex Toys And Subway Stories, NY Fringe Festival
Sex. Death. Tequila!, NY Fringe Festival
Bite On! at Arden Theatre Company, Philadelphia
-- Compiled by Robert Viagas and the Staff of Playbill On-Line